In this particular dream experience it was like I was shown exactly what I would live inwardly in the near future. It was a bit like a premonition.
The dream was showing me something about my anger. It was so alive and clear and it happened just before I woke up. I kept laying still trying to remember every detail of it and then wrote it in my dream diary that I keep beside my bed, as I had learned to do from Belsebuub’s techniques for dream recall and interpretation.
I realized that my dream was showing me many details of this very strong ego of mine, and I knew that I should reflect upon it later, but looking back after the events, I can see that inwardly I had not really intended to do that.
For the next 2 days after I had this dream, I was waiting to see if something related to it would appear in my day but it didn’t; afterwards and ‘very easily’ I forgot my dream completely, and never did meditate upon it.
Some time later I had an argument with someone. As I was very angry trying to support my opinion about something and to convince the other person about what I believed, criticizing them negatively inwardly about the way they were thinking and approaching things, suddenly the dream I had that day came back to me full force.
And it was like an instant insight, I could see the exact similarities between the dream and the present scene I was living. These similarities shocked me so deeply, that I automatically stopped talking and stood still for some time, trying to perceive and comprehend the information I had just uncovered.
I didn’t expect what I was seeing, the two events weren’t the same, but inwardly the details and elements that were behind my anger in both of them were exactly the same, dictating my behavior exactly in the same way.
I understood through this comparison the real causes of my aggressive behavior in both cases, and what ego was behind it, what it really wanted, how it asserted itself, and this automatically gave me some understanding about the other person’s position too. And because of that, I couldn’t feel anger towards them any longer and the argument ended.
Later, I wrote down all the understanding I had gained to reflect and meditate upon it, in order to understand deeper how this ego works in me. I couldn’t believe what I had experienced, this dream experience had revealed to me the true intentions of my egos and how the egos deceive me.
I can relate to that feeling when you remembered the dream during your conversation. It’s like deja vu sometimes which is coming from a dream that has been forgotten.
Remembering and reflecting on my dreams it’s difficult to understand why I had them and usually, I think is something related to the past events, current egos but not so much about the future. I think when I read back past dreams I might remember events that related to them but then is too late…
Thank you for sharing it, Maria!
Hi Maria,
The guidance you received to help you see that ego in more details, and with a better understanding in your dreams, is really quite amazing. It made me re-think about how I approach some of the dreams I have – in terms of not only seeing what has taken place in the past but also to use them for the future. This was very insightful, so thank you for sharing! Wishing you continued guidance and motivation to keep digging at those egos 🙂
That such a amazing insight Maria, it seems like both experiences supported each other to get a deeper understanding of anger.
I’m a bit like you I try to remember my dreams but I don’t give them enough time to reflect on their meaning.
I thought you described how anger makes us feel and act really well – I definitely can relate. I find that anger really blinds me from seeing the other person’s view or the situation, it’s like wearing blinders which restricts my whole view of the situation and I become ‘narrow minded’. In those times, when the anger state is strong, I’ve seen that it can be a lot of help to not only push myself to come out of that horrible state to be clear and use the technique of eliminating that ego, but to support that push by also making myself listen to the other person’s point of view, because I’ve come to see that I’m experiencing ‘narrow mindedness’ and that I don’t have the full picture. 🙂
Thank you for sharing this experience, it really is helpful to read other people’s experiences and learn from one another.
I can relate to what you say Layla about listening to the other person during in this awful aggressive sate, it can really help me see better and prevent me of making things more worse, but when I’m able to have this insight that shows me to stand back and only listen many times I’ve noticed a force that prevents me from following it and have to be strong and clever enough to insist in just to listen. Thank you very much for mentioning it, I find it very helpful and important in order to be able to deal with this state. Indeed it has been very helpful for me too to read other people’s experiences, it gives me new insights and much strength. Wishing you the best in this beautiful journey of self-knowledge.
Yes I know what you mean, its like that for me too, I have to make a strong effort to direct my senses towards listening and caring about the other person’s opinion because the pull of ‘being right’ taking place in my mind can be quite strong, especially as its easy to get ‘used’ to thinking, feeling and acting as though I’m ‘right’. Anger seems to be the manifestation of the wrong way of thinking, and if we have a drive to do something or want something then we can be like that expression that says a ‘dog with a bone’.
Thanks for the warm wishes Maria, I wish you the same as well and hopefully we can all do what it takes to learn and overcome the negativity within us to grow to have a true sense of care, respect and inner peace!
Thanks for sharing Maria,it is amazing how seeing things under a different LIGHT
can make so much difference.
Thank you Maria for sharing your experience. It was so great that you were first shown how the ego affects you in a dream and then you were given the chance to experience this in real life and also were able to study and deal with it.
Self-knowledge is such an interesting and life changing journey when it comes to uncovering what lies within and when we are able to do something about it. I also find that dream experiences can be very helpful in this journey.
Very interesting experience, Maria — and I can really relate to how the situation unfolded. I’ve definitely had dream situations like this come up as well. Just goes to show that just knowing about inner states doesn’t equal understanding them or being outside of their control.
That’s such an important point Jenny.
What a moment that must’ve been where that dream came back to you in the middle of the situation, to make you stand still like that. Very nice.
I can unfortunately relate to how some dream experiences or daily events that I want to study more, sort of get left behind as live continues on. Sometimes I decide to study a dream I had in the morning that following evening, but if I don’t then there’s already a good chance it, and the lesson and meaning it carried for me, gets lost.
I also like what you say about writing what you learned down on paper. I believe this can work very very well actually. I once wrote a ‘paper’ summarising all the insights I had gained regarding my ‘addiction’ to be stuck behind the computer. There was some really good stuff in there 😉 and it was a great reminder when I kept it on the desk where I used to work behind my computer.
Hi Blake. Many times writing down my understanding of an ego state has helped me, not only as a reminder to reflect and dig deeper in it afterwards, but also during writing it many times I can see more clearly in it or uncover new things and I’ve experienced the same thing during writing my dreams too. Wishing you the best and thank you for sharing.
This sounds amazing Maria, it looks like thanks to this dream, you were able to uncover some hidden agendas of the ego that you were not understanding before.
I also find anger to be a very tricky ego, as so much can be behind it that we just don’t understand. There can be anger due to pride, anger due to lust or jealousy, anger due to fear, so many aspects basically…
Thank you for sharing, and wishing you many more insights!
Indeed Lucia anger is a very tricky ego, and also I’ve seen that many times things may be very complicated and not only one ego behind it, but a combination of many egos as pride, fear, emotional attachments and other aspects as you say and very difficult to dig and see into this complicated combination.. Thank you very much for mentioning this and wishing you too many insights in your inner work.
I agree ladies! It’s not only so entwined with so many other sinister regions of the unconscious, but it’s sooo fast too! I’ve often thought there’s just NO way I will be able to overcome this ego (and any ego) without divine help. There’s just too little power, even if there’s understanding away from the situation; when anger jumps, it’s like lightening, and like a tree being singed from a bolt from the blue, the internal energies are left in such a mess afterwards.
Thanks for sharing so honestly Maria. I would have liked to have seen the look on the face of the person you were in a ‘discussion’ with when you stopped like that! I’ve also experiences flashes of dream recall at odd, sometimes seemingly totally unrelated times, or also, times that felt like de ja vu. But your experience sounds like a real ‘nudge from above’. In my opinion, it sounds like you were rewarded for all the sincere attempts you were making to look within and change.
Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for sharing that, Maria. It must have been a very insightful and powerful dream; I can also relate to anticipating an ego the next day or in the days coming only to not see its obvious manifestations in the days I’m most alert to it. It’s so easy to forget and put our guard down after some time.
I’m glad that when the ego really did arise so clearly that you remembered the dream and were able to put a stop to the negativity straightaway.
Thanks for sharing your experience Maria. It’s very good that you were able to apply what you observed in the dream to a difficult situation in your daily life and to improve the interaction. I think that understanding how anger works within us is definitely a very important aspect of self-knowledge. It is something that has many layers to it and uncovering and changing the way it works within us seems to be an ongoing process. But as you found in your interaction, reducing the way it works within us can have a positive effect upon our own lives and the lives of those around us.