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A Recurring Childhood Dream That Guided Me toward Spirituality

Mike L
Experience submitted by Mike L

When I was very young, from the ages of maybe 5-12, I had a recurring dream. These dreams were always very clear: almost nothing changed from one instance of the dream to the next. I reckon these dreams took place every month or two, most years, with a gradual decrease in frequency towards the end of the sequence of dreams.

In an older version of “The Astral Codex”, Belsebuub writes that a recurring dream signifies something needs to be worked out.

Indeed that would seem to be the case for my recurring dreams. They served as a powerful and inspiring guide to me, leading me in an important direction in my life. Although these dreams happened long ago, they were so powerful, that even as I write about them now, I am deeply struck with emotion and I still get goosebumps.

I have chosen to relate some information about these dreams in this submission, but also to keep other details private, because these dreams were (and still are) so personal and influential to me.

A Trip through a Magical Doorway

The Laundry Room
The laundry room

As a kid, I was always a little afraid of the dark, sometimes very afraid, and I found the laundry room in the basement particularly scary, with its dim lighting, stacks of mysterious boxes and tools that my dad stored down there, and the sinister furnace that made strange noises… The boogeyman man could easily have hidden anywhere!

Within these dreams, I would walk downstairs very calmly in nearly total darkness and walk into the laundry room. The darkness didn’t matter for what I was about to do: one of the walls of the room was different to its normal physical appearance and the wall made itself into a magical doorway. Without any hesitation, I would walk through the open doorway and find myself somewhere completely different.

At this location I would move through my environment, performing a series of actions. As I moved around, I felt an odd mixture of familiarity, impending doom, and comfort/acceptance of the situation. Feeling this all at once is rather odd, I know, but it’s the only way I can explain it…

Then something would happen, always the same thing, and I would wake up.

Impact of the Dream

I would always wake up from these dreams feeling immensely uneasy about life, but because they happened so often, I also became more used to having them.

Eventually, I stopped being surprised by what I dreamt and my response became more centered around why I was having those dreams to begin with. I would go to sleep feeling very contemplative about life, and feeling more and more open to spirituality.

In addition to the troubling feelings, these dreams also filled me with awe and gave me a sense of connection to a great mystery in life, one that I hoped to one day discover and learn all about.

Over those years and the years following, I took a keen interest in alternative spirituality and metaphysics. I did not generally record my dreams, but I would sometimes jot down a list of things I saw within them and try to find the meaning of the symbols on the internet. I didn’t find many answers, but I was very open.

Even with these dreams and other experiences, the feelings they evoked didn’t turn into concrete actions in my life: I was interested in dreams and mysticism, but I had limited knowledge of spiritual information and didn’t know where to find answers. Perhaps I wasn’t ready at the time.

Reflecting upon the Meaning

During my early searches, I was never quite able to piece together what the dream meant or why I was having it. But years later, after discovering Belsebuub’s work, and having explored it for some time, one day when I remembered the dream, I found myself drawn to one particular interpretation.

Once again, I will keep part of this meaning to myself, but I think I was being shown, both through symbolism and feeling, the reality of human life, both the beauty and tragedy, when viewed from a wider spiritual perspective.

  • What a beautiful experience Mike! What inspired me more was how the impact that it had upon you remained enough strong in you through time. Recurring dreams have been a unique help for me in my life making me change decisions and directions that I wouldn’t have in any other case and I feel them as a kind of a connection with the spiritual. I can relate to how they touched your soul and heart deeply directing you towards metaphysics and spirituality, leaving in you a strong impact.
    It’s amazing how the information Belsebuub gives through his work can help and give direction in how to understand and investigate them.
    Thank you very much for sharing.

  • I find a lot of meaning on recurring dreams as well Mike and actually is from repetition I learned the most I know in general.
    And I like this mystery of the astral language when a symbol, person, event or else is repeating in order to take the message through and how this language is been used.

    Your story reminds me one of mine when I was young which provoking fear every time I had it. That made me actually not want to have dreams (not to remember them) for not to pass from the same states again…
    Thanks to Belsebuub’s techniques things are much better now.

    And thanks for sharing Mike!

  • Hi, Mike,

    It is good to see that you came to an understanding about this recurring dream and that it helped you to change the course of your life. It kind of reminds me of a recurring dream that I had when I was little. It was very scary and I would often wake up in fear. After some years I stopped having this dream and then all of a sudden I would have it again. I don’t get this dream anymore but I still feel that I didn’t completely understand the meaning of it. Although the guidance that we got on dreams from Belsebuub’s work points me in the right direction to fully understand the dream.

  • Thanks for sharing those times in your childhood Mike. That dream occurrence of you walking down without fear like that and through a gateway into a different place sounds wonderful!

    It seems from what you say that you already figured out more about why you had this recurring dream and how it guided you towards seeking spirituality in your life.

    Who knows, most of us were not ‘born yesterday’ so to speak and like this experience, and this one too, describe, past lives are an extremely likely thing and my experience concurs with that. So perhaps when we are born into a new physical life where we don’t retain our memories then we (and how kind is that!) are aided to remember that side of us and that it is something real and that it can be pursued in life. Because unfortunately in most society’s the practical knowledge of the exploration of the spiritual is not widespread.

    Very cool how you did manage to find Belsebuub and the information he gives. Which then also allowed to you understand that initial dream. Something amazing actually.

    • Although the dream was disconcerting, there was something unmistakably magical I felt in passing through that gateway. It was one of the earliest “feelings” of magic I can recall.

      It seems not a lot is known about the scope of normal childhood dreams, but I do wonder if many or all of us are given this sort of guidance as children to help us with that memory. I certainly wouldn’t be surprised if that were the case. How better to teach us early on than through mystical dreams?

  • You walking down the stairs to the basement and going through a magical doorway evoked the sense of magic in me. Although it sounds like the dream may be much more serious than that. Thank you for sharing.

  • Mike, Quite an interesting story.. It does seems like it was a long gradual bit of help to make you feel uneasy with the ‘regular’ perspective of life and help you open up to other possibilities. It’s also interesting of when it occurred, as being so young, it’s impressive to think that experiences at this age can have such a lasting effect in our perspectives going forward.

    I had a few recurring dreams when I was a child too, likely around the years of 4-7 years old. One was just a particular scene, which I had never seen in reality before. It had the same few characters/symbols and the same feeling every time. It happened so many times I would wake up wondering what it meant even at that young age. And another was a dream of a mature woman who would enter my room. I think this was actually not a dream, but a regular astral occurrence. The feeling I got was a strange one, and being so young it was kind of like perceiving things which seemed to come up from the deep unknown. There was a deep sense of familiarity with both these dreams, like deja vu.

    Reflecting on them when I was more grown up, I saw that they pointed to my existence in some form prior to this life. As I could not (and still can’t) explain away how these experiences could have occurred as creations of my subconscious when I would not have had any such life experience which could possibly be of a similar nature. I still have questions about the nature of these dreams actually.. And hope to figure them out.

    • When I was about 4 or 5 I had a dream at least twice which was very short, starting and ending exactly the same way.
      I was the youngest of five in a stable household and didn’t know fear.
      The dream only lasted seconds. I was creeping through a house in the dark: I couldn’t see anything but knew there was a wall to my left.
      After a few seconds, the dream ended with a brilliant white flash.
      I woke up with my pyjama jacket soaked in sweat.
      As stated, this happened at least twice.
      I was too young to tell anyone about it: I just didn’t understand it. I thought little about it growing up but many years later, I went with my wife to see the film, A Bridge Too Far and since then have thought that the dream could have been the last seconds of a previous life and that I died in the street fighting in Arnhem when allied forces were clearning German troops from occupied houses.
      Ever since I have held the belief that the spirit goes on and inherits another body after death. This belief that the spirit is immortal leads me not to fear death but to try to make the world a better place for when I return. And I’m happy about that.
      If everyone had this belief the world WOULD beca better place.

      • Thank you for sharing that Anthony, it is amazing how you were able to figure out the meaning of that dream.
        I also agree that if people realised the reality of living many successive lives, the world would be a better place! I also suspect that there is a work of dark forces behind ridiculing and denying the existence of many lives, because if people forget that they are being born again and again, and think that they only have one life-time, then its easier for them to leave the destruction behind them, to damage the planet and the environment they live in. I like how you put it “to try to make the world a better place for when I return”. 🙂 Funny but true I think.

      • Thank you Anthony, it is so nice to hear of personal stories like this, where an insight figured out over a long period in one’s life is shared. And how such an experience and intuitive interpretation of lead to a greater understanding.

        I think many types of experiences from different sources are possible for us to experience in the world of dreams, yet it does seem these very specific real feeling scenarios in early childhood, like the one you describe (and like those described by many accounts on Youtube from people who were remembering past lives) can be a ‘memory’ and reliving of an event from a past life.

        I wish more people, because many people have some sort of ‘supernatural’ dream experience throughout childhood, would do something with it and act on that curiosity they might feel when the memory of such experiences resurfaces.

        Wishing you all the best in your life Anthony.

      • Brief as those dreams may have been, they sound really intense. Maybe they were related to a past life! It seems a lot of people who spontaneously remember past existences have those memories come to them when they are very young.
        I think this sort of understanding can be really beneficial in increasing our understanding of life and death, even overcoming the fear of death. I totally agree that with the belief and knowledge that we may return after death, the world would be a better place. I think people would want to use their lives wisely, being aware that human life is part of a much greater spiritual journey with a virtually unlimited potential.

  • Hi Mike,

    Thank you for sharing this impactful experience.

    I remember as a very young child, we lived at one of the high floors of a block of flats, and very often I had a ‘dream’ where I would get up from my bed, go through the window and gently slide down towards the ground. At that time that hight was frightening to me and I would always wake up just before reaching the ground. Looking back at it, I think it was probably an out-of-body experience, but I didn’t know it.

    Much later as a teenager, I remember a recurring theme in my dreams that I didn’t understand for a long time, but now it is more clear.

    I wish you mcuh strength to be able to achieve what that recurring dream was pushing you to do!

    • Thanks for the comment, Pavlin.

      I bet that dropping to the ground was frightening. Oh the things we only understand later in life, how nice it would be to apply that knowledge in our early life! Just imagine learning to astral travel as a young child!

  • The dream sounds quite powerful Mike. Your behavior after passing through the “magical doorway” reminds me a bit how I behave in what I call “subconscious lucid dreams” – when I am aware that I can fly around, pass through the solid objects, etc., but my psyche is completely driven by subjective states, acting like in a movie. These types of dreams also have a familiarity within them, but the one that is not of the clear and peaceful nature.

    Regarding the laundry room, it is interesting in a way, as it reminded me of a dream I had as a child too. In this dream, I walked around the neighborhood where I was living at that time, and come to the local vegetables shop. For some reason, I went in, but it looked different inside. There were no vegetables or nothing as usual, but it was kind of desolate and dark, and there was a strange and eerie mechanical noise coming out of its darkest corner. Wanting to see what it was, I walked in its direction and found a big washing machine, turning round and round, making that terrible noise. There was somethign sinister about it that woke me up.

    I only had this dream once, but it left a powerful imprint on me for a reason I never fully understood until I came across Belsebuub’s work and learned about the wheel of life and what it meant for people.

    • That’s curious how the washing machine reminded you about the turning of the wheel of life. I never made this link. I wonder the impact of such deeply ingrained symbols on us, especially when what we see today is clouded from its esoteric meaning.

    • Wow… I’ll never look at a washing machine the same way again, Lucia!

      What an interesting, but highly effective, symbol for the terribly mechanical forces behind life and death.

      • I agree Mike, quite a peculiar symbol… I also remember mentioning this dream to one friend who was also into spirituality at that time, and he said something like “ah yes, this washing machine is washing our karma”. I thought it was interesting, since indeed, we often have to pay what we have “earned” in the past lives, and in this way, “washing” our wrongdoings. But the tragedy is that without a proper esoteric understanding people are bound to repeat those mistakes again and again, and then they have to be ‘washed’ again and again. I wish that the basics of the true spiritual work that leads to liberation would be taught in schools, so that at least everyone knew what is going on even if they don’t wish to awaken in their lifetime.

    • Thank you for sharing this Lucia, you inspired me in how you interpreted your dream, I’ve never thought about it like this and it does make sense. You really touched in me.

  • Thanks for that MIke. Recurring dreams are a curious phenomenon and it sounds like there was something you needed to learn about from those repeating dreams. It’s good that you were able to remember the details more recently and were able to gain a better understanding of the message behind the recurring dream.

  • Reading this gave me goosebumps too Mike! You describe really well the sense of the mysterious that’s much more vivid as a child. It seems like you were being reminded consistently of your real mission in life!
    Though I didn’t have a specific series of events that repeated in my dreams, I did have recurring dreams that gave me THAT feeling, similar to the one you describe. Often they’d be lucid/semi lucid, where I’d return to a sense of ‘oh yes, I remember I can fly now’. These dreams also meant that I was always open to hearing more and learning more about the mystical side of life as I just knew that there was so much more going on, that there was that feeling over there.

    Thanks again, a beautiful account.

    • It’s quite interesting how much help and guidance we are offered towards the inner work, even when we are just children.

      I think your description of “semi lucid” sounds quite appropriate. And perhaps that way the dream has a bigger effect upon us, as we can “feel” its importance more deeply.

Who Is Belsebuub?

Belsebuub is an author who has previously published several books on dreams and out-of-body experiences and has discussed these topics widely in the media. He withdrew from public life in 2010. Read more about Belsebuub's work on dreams...

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