Experience submitted by Hayden

One morning I woke up with an uncomfortable feeling, it was quite unpleasant and my first impulse was to get up and distract myself so the feeling would go away. But something within told me it would be beneficial to understand why I felt this way so I fought the discomfort and began to try to piece together fragments of my dreams from the night before.

I lay very still and tried to concentrate but nothing would come. Fighting the urge to give up I remained concentrated and gradually I began to see vague images of me walking through a garden scene, it felt kind of related but I couldn’t see anything untoward in that so I thought I needed to go deeper.

I began a dream recall mantra I’d learned in Belsebuub’s courses some years earlier and I was able to go deeper into the garden scene and visualize the grass, winds, sun and plants, but still nothing terribly scary.

I kept going with the mantra and saw myself walking around a grassy knoll then suddenly from nowhere two tigers appeared and bound towards me. They were totally terrifying, roaring and salivating, bounding closer and closer and appeared intent on ripping me to shreds.

I didn’t know what to do and started to run, they bound closer and closer and when they were within a single bound launched themselves into air directly at me. I knew I was about to be torn limb from limb.

Then all of a sudden iron bars materialized between us blocking them mid jump, still they lashed out with their paws, their jagged claws looked certain to separate my skin from my bones. I pulled back and their claws missed me by less than an inch. They kept roaring and throwing themselves against the bars with a great ferocity but they weren’t able to reach me.

Photo by Jessica Weiller found on Unsplash.

Photo by Jessica Weiller found on Unsplash. (Featured)

I was terrified yet compelled to watch them, not understanding from where they came or why they were attacking. My heart was beating rapidly and I tried to understand what this scene meant but nothing came to my mind. I ceased the mantra and lay still in bed my mind racing, what did this dream mean? Why were the tigers attacking? Was it a premonition of some impending disaster?

With a sense of impending doom I turned to Belsebuub’s dream symbol guide to try to find the meaning. Flicking through the pages I found the section on tigers. They had positive and negative connotations and it was pretty obvious to me that within this dream they weren’t positive. On the negative side it said “strong enemies, treason by someone, or that someone is intending to treason you.”

Great, someone’s going to treason me, well that didn’t sound too good. Well at least I was forewarned so what was I going to do about it. The fear within me was palpable and I had no idea who was going to attack me nor what I could do to prevent it, but I knew I had to do something.

All that came to mind was, okay if I can’t prevent this from happening well maybe I can change the way I react, I’ve been forewarned so what should I do. I decided the best course of action was to do the meditation practice analysis on an ego. This was another technique from Belsebuub which would enable me to understand how I would react to treason, analyze the fears, the sense of betrayal, the negativity and all associated states.

It took a while but I stilled my mind, separated from the fear and began the practice. Within 20 minutes I had an understanding of what was to come, jumped out of bed and readied myself for work.

I didn’t know exactly what was coming my way but was pretty sure a major betrayal was going to happen at work.

The morning passed relatively uneventfully, just the normal chaos of my office job. Likewise the early afternoon passed, and I thought perhaps I had misinterpreted the dream. Then it happened, what should have been a routine meeting turned into an ambush.

Photo by Benjamin Child found on Unsplash.

Photo by Benjamin Child found on Unsplash.

What was really interesting was not the details of the meeting itself or how a colleague manipulated circumstances to betray me. What was interesting was my internal state and how I reacted. Having been forewarned and having studied the egos.

I was ready for what was to come. As the trap was sprung, I observed the fears arise within me without identification, I didn’t become negative or angry instead calmly dealt with the event as best as I could. I can’t say it was pleasant but what could have been a substantive event with career damaging implications ended up quite the opposite.

The truth was revealed, my deceitful colleague unmasked, but most importantly I had learned more about my psyche and how even in a crisis it is possible to defend yourself with honor.